Ask “Why”; “What” Follows Naturally

By David Wunderli

In making decisions, “What am I going to do?” is the first consideration for many. How rarely do we ask why we need or want to do something, to guide us in a possibly overwhelming number of choices.

Bless Not Impress

 The motto “seek to bless not impress” has been quoted in contexts ranging from athletics to religious leadership. For me it has been a  behavioral litmus test throughout my adult life. Unfortunately, the natural man in me has, at times, sought to impress rather than bless.

I need to keep in mind that the Gospel of Jesus Christ teaches us that this life is not a random occurrence, but that our existence has divine purpose, created and set in motion by a loving God. We sometimes try to impress others by how much we know; but President Dallin H. Oaks has proclaimed and is often quoted: “In contrast to the institutions of the world, which teach us to know something, the gospel of Jesus Christ challenges us to become something.”  We need to ask why we have chosen this goal and work toward it with this reasoning in mind.

I have learned that on this journey of becoming, the why in our actions matters.  Our motive—intent—matters.  The intent that drives our actions, will impact not only the depth of our development, but the magnitude of our change.

Recognize and Avoid Hypocrisy

In His Sermon on the Mount, the Savior taught,

Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven. Therefore, when thou doest thine alms, do not sound a trumpet before thee, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward. (Mathew: 6:1,2)

And later in the same sermon, He instructed,  “Moreover when ye fast, be not, as the hypocrites, of a sad countenance: for they disfigure their faces, that they may appear unto men to fast. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward” (Mathew 6:16).

I have found that in my own giving of time or means, if I give with even the slightest desire to be seen, my otherwise benevolent feelings of having done a good thing feel shallow and void of the full spirit that I could have felt had my motive for giving been out of love for neighbor or love of God.

Likewise, in our relations with others, do we share conversations with the intent to impress or to bless?  Do we speak out of intent to bring comfort, encouragement, and love to another, or to seek acceptance and praise?

 Cherish Charity

In his letter to the Corinthians, Paul taught,

 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing. (1Cor: 13:1-3)

It seems that righteous intent—born out of love for God or neighbor—is at the core of our “becoming as He is.”  Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf, in his book After All We Can Do, teaches, “oh how we need to love God! For what we love determines what we seek. What we seek determines who we are—and who we will become.”

If we ask why in making all our choices, and are able to answer “love for God” or “love for others” rather than recognizing love for ourselves, our intent will be pure and our becoming will be aligned more closely with the character of Christ.

As our Prophet, President Nelson, has counseled us, “When we humble ourselves before God and pray with all the energy of our hearts, God will grant us charity.” He mentions characteristics we know well from the scriptures: long-suffering, kindness, lack of envy or self-importance; not being “easily provoked” or likely to judge others unfairly.

President Nelson continued, “the pure love of Christ is the answer to the contention that ails us today. Charity propels us ‘to bear one another’s burdens’ rather than heap burdens upon each other.”  Christ’s pure love enables us “to demonstrate how men and women of Christ speak and act—especially when under fire.”

As Moroni (7:47) concluded, “charity is the pure love of Christ, and it endureth forever; and whoso is found possessed of it at the last day, it shall be well with him.”

If we ask why rather than what as we begin making our plans, we are heading toward the charity side where Jesus wants us, rather than the hypocrisy side he has warned us to avoid.